40 Lessons in 40 Years…….

Last week I turned 40.

4. 0.

I think I’m still kind of in shock, but here we are.

So I decided to make a list of 40 things I’ve learned in this 40 years of life.

And I’m a bit embarrassed that it took me almost a month to compile the list.

But I finally finished.

So if you’d like to glean wisdom from a 40-year-old childless housewife, read on. ๐Ÿ˜€

40 lessons I’ve learned in 40 years:

1. You will eventually be content with your decision not to have kids.

2. Naps spark joy and may become your most favorite time of the day

3. There is no need to buy a makeup remover unless you are going on vacation and can’t take a whole jug of olive oil with you or you are allergic to olive oil. Cheapest makeup remover on the market.
(EDIT: Apparently waterproof mascara doesn’t come off with olive oil as well as other commercial brands. So, 3A would be, only wear waterproof mascara for very special occasions.)

4. Make sure you have separate jugs of olive oil–one for cooking, one for skincare.

5. Call your grandparents at least once a month or once a week.

6. Butter is always better.

7. Don’t freak out if your wedding night sex/first time sex isn’t that great. You have your entire marriage/relationship to work on that aspect of your relationship
and honestly, figure out what works for you and your partner and, I know it’s hard, but not comparing yourself to other couples is key to being content.

8.Your SAT score is just a number and doesn’t determine your worth as a person nor
how successful you’ll be in life.

9. Take care of your body, but don’t be afraid of growing older. The first
gray hair I got when I was 30 was devastating, but I’ve since learned to embrace it
and call my gray hairs “unicorn strands.” I’m now looking forward to turning into a majestic unicorn.

10. If you ever accidentally get drunk, NEVER drink and drive of course, but also never get on social media. If you think you might, make sure you have a sober buddy to watch and make sure you don’t make that mistake. (Please drink responsibly and only after turning 21 ๐Ÿ˜‰ ).

11. Never date someone you don’t like because you don’t want to hurt their feelings by rejecting them.

12. No is a complete sentence.

13. Those lists of “rules” to follow in fashion after a certain age are bullshit.
Wear what makes you feel beautiful and confident.

14. Only have children (by birth, adoption or fostering) if you want them. You don’t have to have children to live a fulfilling, rich life.

15. Wear sunscreen every time you go outside.

16. Pair the sunscreen with sun glasses.

17. Begin monthly breast exams early (preferably in high school) so you can know what your breasts feel like and you can more easily identify potential issues.

18. Pray for the President daily, no matter who he/she is, or what party they come from.
Praying for our leaders is a biblical tenet and shouldn’t be dismissed.

19. There is freedom in doing things that scare you. (Although I need to point out that, although there might be freedom in it, I still don’t have a desire to skydive, go on a roller coaster or repel off a tall building. ๐Ÿ˜› )

20. Its OK to have the courage to decide for yourself through study and research what you believe, what are your morals, and what you will stand up for, independent from your parents.

21. If you are in therapy and are not comfortable or happy with your therapist, switch.
Therapists are not one sized fits all and it’s important to find someone you are comfortable with.

22. Embrace you curves. After a certain age, everyone will have rolls and cellulite. True story: the other day I was wearing a new shirt that I purchased online and it’s slightly smaller than I thought so even though I probably looked like a busted can of biscuits. I still wore it out because I love it so much.

23. Never allow anyone to steal your sparkle.

24. You’ll finally understand what that translucent yellow pill was that your parents took every morning: Fish oil.

25. When asking someone out on a date, literally use the words, “Do you want to go out on a date with me?” This will make your intentions clear and both parties will be on the same page. (Maybe it can be your brave thing you do that day. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

26. Before you post on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter ask yourself, “Will this come back to bite me in the bum in 10 years?” If the answer is yes, don’t do it.

27. If you see two memes for colonoscopies in a 24-hour period, God is probably trying
to tell you something.

28. You truly are your own worst critic. (Yes, I’m 28 items in and am getting trite, but this one is actually quite true.)

29. Forgive yourself for past mistakes. Acknowledge them and move forward. Once you know better, be better.

30. Don’t be afraid to question things you don’t understand.

31. When traveling on an airplane, always pack your medicine, pair of underwear and any other important medical supplies in your carry-on luggage in case your checked luggage gets lost or there is an overnight delay.

32. Be humble enough to apologize to children of any age when you’ve wronged them in some way.ย 

33. Lists will save your life.

34. Take occasional breaks from social media. It can be quite refreshing. (Ok, at this point my list has somehow turned into some sort of intervention. ๐Ÿ˜› )

35. Reward yourself for tiny tasks with a TV show, YouTube video or snack.
Did the dishes? Watch an episode or two of FRIENDS. With a bowl of ice cream. (Or whatever you think is a good treat.)

36. Don’t rely on one source for all your news. Consume at least two or three sources to get the full story.

37. Be open-minded enough to realize you aren’t always going to be right.

38. When you apologize, be sincere.

39. Before you go on vacation, do some cleaning around the house. My mom used to do this when I was a kid and I never understood why because it’s not like we’d be home toย  enjoy the cleanliness. But as an adult, the few times I’ve done this, I finally understand. It feels SO good to come home from vacation to a clean house or at least a clean living room.

40. When you discoverย  a toxic person in your circle, do not be afraid to distance yourself from that person. Your mental and emotional health will thank you.