Settle For The Best Part 2………….

In February I wrote about red flags to avoid in dating and relationships. Ever since then I wanted to share the other side, ie, what qualities to look for in a potential partner. This spring Chad and I celebrated 10 years together (since our first date) and I thought this would be the perfect time to give you a little insight into what my experience was and how I knew Chad was “the one.”

So Chad and I met online in 2008. You can read my list of safety tips for online dating here. On that list, I believe I wrote about how you need to choose to go out on dates with guys who respect your safety rules. Right off the bat, Chad impressed me because he was totally open to traveling to my city and arriving separately to each of our date locations (there were 2). When you have a person who is down with going out of their way to make you feel safe, you have a good one.

But what initially drew me in was after our first conversation over internet chat? He asked me if he could give me a hug.

I know it seems kinda cheesy and weird to ask for a hug online, which apparently you do like this ((persons name here)), but I was still flattered. Asking for permission before any intimate contact lets the person you are interested in know that they are valued in your eyes.

Then came our second date. We went to a Weird Al concert and then afterward I had a bladder accident. And Chad was completely chill. I cleaned up and we continued our date….and ended up in the ER because Chad came down with a bad migraine.

When we first arrived at the ER, Chad’s name was called to go back into the intake and Chad wanted me to come back with him, even though we had just started dating. During the intake, they asked for his social security number.

There was no way Chad could have lied about that piece of information. Of course, I had gained a bit of trust in him before this moment, but knowing that he trusted me to have this information was a big sign to me.

We celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary late last week. Earlier this summer I found this meme online and fell in love again:
Facebook Cover Photo Guac

And I wish that every kid in high school, college, and beyond would get a print out of this and put it on their bedroom wall as a reminder of how valuable they are. To not settle for free chips and salsa, but wait for the guacamole that they deserve.

It was because of this meme that I decided to totally lean into the avocado theme and rename my subscriber’s anxious avocados. Because I want to be a reminder to you that you deserve the best, no matter what that looks like.

Cheers!

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Storytime: Abducted by Customer Service……..

*Blogger’s note: I have masked the location of this incident and am not using real names because I truly believe this person meant no harm whatsoever and I want to use this story as more of an educational tool to teach others what not to do. 

Also, while this post contains heavy doses of sarcasm, that has more to do with how I cope with these situations and less to do with the actual person.

As of this upload, the museum in question has reached out and offered a formal apology. 


This weekend Chad and I went on a mini get-a-way. As part of our weekend, we toured a vintage 1950’s style home that has been turned into a museum. Although I was using my wheelchair, I was able to tour it because they had put on a ramp at the back of the house to accommodate wheelchairs.

After we toured the home, we began to make our way across the street and up the block to go to the next gathering of this event. All of a sudden this woman, wearing a museum badge, approached us. She was very excited to greet us and told us that they had just put the ramp in last year and she was SO glad we were there to tour the museum.

And I’m pretty sure I was the first person in a wheelchair to come through the museum. 

Why? Keep reading…….

She introduced herself as one of the curators of the museum and then the conversation took a turn-Her: “I used to work in healthcare. What is your diagnosis?” Me: (Slightly flustered as people ask me all the time what is my disability, but her way of asking was a bit more unique.) “Spina Bifida,” I said.

“Oh wow!” she said. And then it happened.

My husband had been pushing my wheelchair this whole time as we were walking to the next event of the weekend. And suddenly, without asking, the curator GRABBED MY WHEELCHAIR from my husband and started PUSHING ME!!

Now, Chad and I were so shocked we didn’t say anything, and I know that probably wasn’t the best course of action, but here’s the thing: when you’ve been disabled all your life, stuff like this (normally not exactly like this) happens frequently and honestly you just have to pick your battles or you’d end up in an early grave, a victim of repeated 2nd hand social awkwardness.

So we let it go, for about half a block until Chad casually told the lady that he could take over pushing me. Her reply?

“Oh don’t worry, I used to work in healthcare, I know what I’m doing!” 

Um……

Listen, Linda!Can I call you Linda? Cool. Here are a few tips to keep in mind the next time someone in a wheelchair comes through the museum: 

1. When you see a person in a wheelchair, you may approach but DO. NOT. TOUCH. The wheelchair is an extension of the person’s body and is therefore off-limits unless the person specifically asks for help. 

2. Throughout our entire interaction, you mentioned several times that you used to work in health care. I’m just not sure how relevant that information was to the situation. Especially since when we came to a curb cut and you took me down backwards, I almost fell out of my chair. 

Yeah. That was a fun experience.

When you have a situation like this, ask the person in the chair which direction they prefer to come down. 

Also, after this incident we could only assume that when you said you worked in healthcare, you meant to say front desk or billing department of the hospital. 

3. Honestly I would have still told you what my disability was even if you didn’t tell me you used to work in health care. I know others in the disabled community have a different opinion to sharing their diagnosis, but for me, I’ve always had the opinion that others will never learn if they don’t ask. I know this can be confusing, so a good way to ask is this, “Would you mind if I asked you your diagnosis?” 

4. Your museum is awesome and we thoroughly enjoyed our tour. I promise you if you implement the suggestions above, it will be an enjoyable experience for all attendees. 

Cheers! 

Foodie Friday: The One Where Lulabelle Reviews Dunkin Donuts New Menu Item: Donut Fries……(Alternate Title: Dear Dunkin Donuts: What Were You Thinking?)

Last night Miranda Sings dropped a new video on her YouTube channel. She teamed up with Dunkin Donuts to promote their new Donut Fries. (Be warned, it’s Miranda Sings singing to the tune of Rebecca Black’s “Friday” and you’ll likely contract a viral earworm if you watch the commercial too many times. You’re welcome! 😉 ) As soon as I saw the commercial, I knew what I had to do. 

I had to get them immediately. 

Thankfully Chad was able to go grab them for my breakfast this morning. And I dug right in.

I just wonder how long these were field tested before being rolled out. I feel like maybe the launch was a bit rushed. 

Why? 

I guess it was my fault. I just assumed that donut fries would be donuts in the shape of (in this case, steak cut) fries. 

This was not accurate at all

For starters, the outside of the donut fry wasn’t coated all the way around in sugar like a regular donut should be. Instead it kind of looked like someone had taken a fried donut-esque thing-more on that in a minute-and very casually, with zero concept of accurate aim, threw some sugar on very haphazardly. 

When I bit into the end of the donut, I was in for a shock. It was not a regular donut taste or texture.
Guys, it was definitely potato-y.
And definitely not as sweet as a donut. 
I think they took the name “Donut Fries” WAY too literal. 

It felt like Dunkin Donuts was like that parent that tries to get their kid to eat vegetables and decides to add sugar where sugar shouldn’t be, rendering the already objectionable food completely inedible. 

Also the “crispy” outer layer felt less like a donut and more like a flaky wonton wrapper. 

The entire experience was so strange so I’ve decided to give this Dunkin Donuts product a hard pass…..much like a kidney stone.

Cheers!