In February I wrote about red flags to avoid in dating and relationships. Ever since then I wanted to share the other side, ie, what qualities to look for in a potential partner. This spring Chad and I celebrated 10 years together (since our first date) and I thought this would be the perfect time to give you a little insight into what my experience was and how I knew Chad was “the one.”
So Chad and I met online in 2008. You can read my list of safety tips for online dating here. On that list, I believe I wrote about how you need to choose to go out on dates with guys who respect your safety rules. Right off the bat, Chad impressed me because he was totally open to traveling to my city and arriving separately to each of our date locations (there were 2). When you have a person who is down with going out of their way to make you feel safe, you have a good one.
But what initially drew me in was after our first conversation over internet chat? He asked me if he could give me a hug.
I know it seems kinda cheesy and weird to ask for a hug online, which apparently you do like this ((persons name here)), but I was still flattered. Asking for permission before any intimate contact lets the person you are interested in know that they are valued in your eyes.
Then came our second date. We went to a Weird Al concert and then afterward I had a bladder accident. And Chad was completely chill. I cleaned up and we continued our date….and ended up in the ER because Chad came down with a bad migraine.
When we first arrived at the ER, Chad’s name was called to go back into the intake and Chad wanted me to come back with him, even though we had just started dating. During the intake, they asked for his social security number.
There was no way Chad could have lied about that piece of information. Of course, I had gained a bit of trust in him before this moment, but knowing that he trusted me to have this information was a big sign to me.
We celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary late last week. Earlier this summer I found this meme online and fell in love again:
And I wish that every kid in high school, college, and beyond would get a print out of this and put it on their bedroom wall as a reminder of how valuable they are. To not settle for free chips and salsa, but wait for the guacamole that they deserve.
It was because of this meme that I decided to totally lean into the avocado theme and rename my subscriber’s anxious avocados. Because I want to be a reminder to you that you deserve the best, no matter what that looks like.