Good Tuesday to you all!! While both our girls are sleeping soundly, let’s get into the topic of the day!
Do you guys remember when I wrote that piece to the girl with Spina Bifida? Remember how I had said that was the most vulnerable I’d been on my blog? Well, after letting this one sit in my head for a month or so, I think it’s time to release it. Today’s blog will be the most vulnerable I’ve ever been, but I’m writing it in hopes of helping others dealing with the same thing. So, here it goes…..
My disability has changed my body in several ways over the years. I’m not able to move around as much as I could when I was a kid. I use my wheelchair more frequently now. My bladder has also changed. This has been one of the most frustrating changes.
As women age, their menstrual cycles sometimes shift to a heavier flow or more painful cramps. For me this change manifested itself by making my bladder gush forth several times a day during my cycle. This has gone on for many years. One benefit of this is that it is so consistent that I know my period will begin shortly after this occurs. But it makes it no less frustrating.
See, on the worst days of this, I end up changing clothes at least twice. Usually more. Any liquid that I consume races right through me. It gets to the point where I just sit at home, trying to keep my mind off things. I don’t drink much liquid on these days for fear of changing clothes again. I pretty much live in the bathroom on these days.
I have taken medication to fight off these bladder spasms. It worked well for years, but then my insurance company quit covering it and I had to switch to a new one. This new one works pretty well, but is not as long lasting as the first. And when I’m in the throes of a long day of changing clothes constantly, I can get so into my head that I forget to take it. (In Real Time: Can you believe just sitting here writing this I had a pretty sizable spasm? Calm down, bladder! 😛 )
On these days, I’m reminded why we (my husband and I) were chosen to remain childless. There is no way I’d be able to take care of myself and a child on these days.
So dear female, I know you are tired and frustrated from constantly visiting the bathroom and changing into yet another pair of clothes. I know you feel unattractive and less of a woman simply because your bladder doesn’t work the way it should. But here are truths you need to hang on to:
1. You are attractive
2. You are worthy of love
3. At least you have clean laundry 😉
4. This too shall pass
If you are currently going through endless bladder spasms and mountains of laundry, you are certainly not alone. I’m rooting for you.
Embarrassed spider image courtesy of cartoonstock.com