LATE NIGHT LAFF: In Real Time: YouTube Edition: MASSIVE Cinnamon Toast Crunch Challenge (7,000 calories)

So here we are. May 27th, 2016 and for some reason, it’s so hot outside that even with the AC on and the windows closed, I still feel sticky. And gross.  You are right, I probably should take off my pajama pants that are velour.

Ok, I now see where I went wrong. Yep. Cotton is a much better fabric for summer.

So our household is about to begin a crazy month. A month where my brain is already anticipating the busyness and maybe I’m a little freaked out.

So when I thought about doing a blog today, my brain was having difficulty conjuring up, well, anything. Thankfully Chad shared the following video on my Facebook Timeline and viola’ my blog suddenly had an entry!

Today I’m going to expand my In Real Time series and watch and record my thoughts on a Youtube video of competitive eater Matt Stonie. In this video he eats 3 large boxes of Cinnamon Toast Crunch (totalling 7,000 calories). I don’t know how long it takes him to eat this, but the video is 7 minutes and 40 seconds long. Let’s get started:

1:16-he’s just poured in the third box of cereal into the bowl and I’m already getting nervous. Like, I don’t want to see him throw up on video. Anyone else have throw up anxiety??

1:59-Dude just poured in an entire gallon of milk. It’s probably implied, but let’s face it, this is the US so it HAS to be said:


2:20-Ok, I guess I hadn’t paid attention. He actually only put in a box and a half of cereal, but they were the big ones.

2:41-Spoke too soon. He topped off the bowl. Lord have mercy!

3:00-About to start eating it (I think). I’d really like to see him go at it hands free without a spoon, just stick his entire head in the bowl! #whoswithme??

3:00-Fast Hawaiian drum luau music plays to heighten anticipation… worked. This is the most exciting part of my day #saddestsentenceever

3:13-He just whipped out a spoon. This is a bit of a let down! 😛

3:23-He’s now eating and I gotta say, it’s not as fast as I had anticipated. The spoon is large though and milk IS falling onto the counter.

3:27-Ah, they sped up the footage for our benefit. Kinda glad. I was getting bored. #ADHDisRealYo!

3:52-I’m actually tempted to run this to the end and then watch it in reverse to see the bowl mysteriously fill up with cereal…..Which I’m kinda hungry for now! #outtamilk #honeydewlist 😉

3:59-Wait, he now is taking a break to talk about how he’s feeling about the experience. Is this allowed?

4:52-He just announced that he’s trying to get it finished in 10 minutes. He then runs out of camera range. I think he puked. Came back with a napkin. #theplotthickens

4:58-PLOT TWIST**He just picked up the entire bowl and is drinking the excess milk. That must have been what was slowing him down. It’s been 8:03:20 (video sped up in parts)

6:01-At this point it’s more milk than cereal. He looks like he’s not sick. #miracle

6:39-He’s FINISHED! His time was 17:06:16. He looks relieved….and a little nauseated. Oh Lord, please don’t let him puke. I watched the whole thing and he didn’t puke once.

So the video is done and my final thoughts are that this was a bit anti-climatic. I mean, there wasn’t even one milk spew. I went to high school with a kid that once drank about a gallon of milk, which was impressive enough….until we saw it in reverse! At least that was a little entertaining. 

This just made me hungry!


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