Where Are We Going? I Have No Idea!!

Of all the things in life I could have never been; truck driver, CPA, that person that gets shot out of a canon at the circus….ect….the weirdest thing is carrier pigeon. Not just because I’m not a bird, but because my sense of direction, to put it mildly, blows.  Let me draw you a picture. When I first started blogging, I noticed that on the stats page there is a map of the world and you could see where in the world people are reading your blog. Pretty cool, right? Well, one day I noticed a part of the world highlighted that was attached to Canada but located off the lower 48 of the US. I was SO excited!!! Another part of the world besides the US and Canada was reading my blog!!! Ladies and gentlemen, that section of earth I was so hyped about? ALASKA! (At this point, my parents are probably beaming with pride! 😀 )

Yep, directions and geography are lacking in my brain. The following meme I found on Facebook describes my life with scary accuracy:

Unless I’m looking at a map-with accompanying directional guide or physically holding a compass, when I go out into the world, the words ‘north’, ‘south’, ‘east’, and ‘west’ mean nothing to me. Since lacking a sense of direction is a point of anxiety for me, using these words, while it might seem helpful at the time, actually make my directional anxiety worse. The most helpful thing for me is to be guided by landmarks around me. The words ‘left’ and ‘right’ are the only directional beacons my brain responds to. Fortunately the man I married gets this.

A few years ago I had just moved from the big city to be nearer him as we prepared to get married. One day I needed to go downtown, a place within walking (or rolling in my case) distance from my apartment. I got lost. In a panic–and more than slightly annoyed–I called my fiance’ and asked him to come down and get me and just drive me to where I needed to go. Yes, I asked him to drive several miles to pick me up, to drive me several blocks. Anxiety can make you want to do strange things, my friends. Fortunately, my man is patient and kind and knows me well. He calmly asked me to describe where I was, the names of the buildings and streets. Then, using only left or right, he guided me to where I needed to be. My very own handsome homing pigeon.

So, if you are also one of the directionally challenged adults, take heart. You are not alone. Now, if you ever see me out in the world and I look lost, just be patient and calmly guide me to the nearest Ulta store. I need to replace my lost pair of tweezers

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